deepgreen18

Confused: Yesterday (I think) Livejournal said I had posted 2 days ago, and now it says 4 days. Also, I have no idea what to do around here. Oh, that's boredom settling in. Okay, must figure that out quickly. I've ordered about 5 books from the library but they are all on hold for other people. This is annoying. Of course, I could knit, watch DVD's, read my (only!) book from the library, or cruise in internet for amusement, but, dang it, I want the library to give me it's booty now. I'm a wee bit impatient, apparently.

Jubilant: I have a second cousin! This is a first for my mother's side of the family, actually. The first baby from our rather tight-knit group of kids from my mom and her sisters. Everyone, please send a warm mental welcome to Cassandra. She was born yesterday in Louisiana. This is rather incredibly exciting for me, and not just because I get to knit baby clothes for her. My future is better mapped if I know how everyone else in my generation has done it before me.

Tired: This is just a basic fact of life, apparently. I'm sleeping well, and for long periods. I just need more time to recover from my graduating semester. Mentally, I'm doing a lot better. The constant focus on "What's next?" has faded, and I'm working on establishing a good schedule until I go off to music camp this July.

Overall, I'm pretty happy with life. I just found out that I got all A's for my last semester; something I was not expecting. Well, life is like that sometimes. It's good to end the way you started, if you start well.

Later,
Greeny

Current Mood: amused

As most of my loyal, devoted, (and yet non-commenting) readers know, I have graduated. This has caused, unsurprisingly to the world, and surprisingly to little ol' home-schooled me, an influx of cards and cash. It's rather wondrous. Really, that's all I have to say on the subject. It's just plain cool.

To mix things up a bit, my knitting has re-started. I was casting about (pun intended) for something new to knit, and voila! I found a pattern I had stored away in my queue on Ravelry (TM). It's a kerchief, and I'm knitting it in denim yarn, which is supposed to shrink 20% lengthwise when you wash it. This fascinates me. I can't wait to see it happen. (As a side note, this choice of yarn is ironic because (a): It's denim, my favorite type of pants [though slacks are starting to compete], and (b): it's dark blue, my semi-favorite color, and I didn't realize all this until after I bought it).

This summer is going to be a busy one, if this week is any indication. This weekend I'll be chaperoning one of my students and her sister at a music competition, and I'm getting paid to do it (I'm a glorified baby-sitter, and I'm liking it!). I'm also going to a party with the guy friend (thanks be to Autumn for the nomenclature). There's my uncle's wedding in Illinois at the end of the month, and I'm also applying to go to a summer music camp in lieu of taking summer classes at our local community college. This will cause me to be in North Carolina for at least four weeks. I'll probably be posting a bit more frequently while I'm there. Add to that my normal stuff: teaching, doing accounts for dad and the school where I teach, taking lessons, playing in band, and we have a very nice recipe for distraction. Me bored is a bad thing; it's much worse and more insidious than me hungry.

Right now, I'm supposed to be doing something for Dad.

Maybe I should go do that now.
Greeny

Current Mood: industrious, and wordy
Current Location: Home
Current Music: My brother on his guitar, messing around

I haven't done much the past two days, but the weekend was uber-busy. You know, graduation, grad parties, movie-watching, dinner with my sister on Saturday. Then there was Mother's day brunch with the family, moving completely out of my apartment (which I've never done before, thanks to summer storage), and into the house. Because of these events and a chronic lack of sleep, I woke up on Monday a bit sick. I still am a bit sick (and my calves hurt, but that's another story).

I am suddenly compelled to tell the story. Monday afternoon me and Dad went to look at office spaces for his business. He's narrowed it down to two places. One is on the twentieth story of a 40-story building, and the other is the top floor of a 2-story building. We went to the tall one first. On our way out, Dad noticed the stairwell, which, surprise! had two doors at its entrance. I let the first door close, and then we realized that exiting the stairwell would set off the fire alarm. Oops. Long story short: we walked down twenty floors, exited at ground level (which still set off the alarm, but we got permission), and got the heck out of there. I never knew that going down the stairs was official exercise until my calves started hurting.

Lately, I've been unpacking the stuff I need to live comfortably at home. The only thing I've been unable to find is a CD from the library. Thankfully, I still have seven days to find it, but this is not a good feeling to have. I'm usually very conscientious about library stuff.

Thanks for reading!
Greeny

Current Mood: awake
Current Location: The Library, ironically

...Are Finished!!!! And one more thing to go.

The paper that would not end (i.e. the senior paper) was finished yesterday. It felt so good to give it away so that it could be a pain to someone else.

I took one of my two finals this morning, and am sincerely hoping for a B.

I also have three new students that I'll be teaching tomorrow, and I'm just about finished with the cabled baglet I've been working on for a month. Now I have to find something else to work on, darn it.

Man, things happen really fast, sometimes. My sister came down on Saturday because she wanted to go to a funeral. Unfortunately, she missed her flight, and had to come in later. I drove her to our house, and later (11pm) we all played laser tag. On Sunday the dreaded, darn, duplicitous paper was finished, and I went to a movie with Dad and Tim. Then I practiced with the band, leaving very little time to actually study for my final.
As you can perhaps see, the weekend was extremely busy, but the upcoming weekdays? Rather open, actually. I'm enjoying the irony.

I just had a nap, helped my roommate, and made a onion, bacon, and mayonnaise sandwich. It's good.

Whee! Sorry, I feel energized. I need to go study for my other Lit final, so off I go! -slightly insane singing- No more papers, no more papers! -end insanity-

Byebye.
Greeny

Current Mood: excited
Current Location: Teh Library of doooom

It's unexpected, but last week went rather well. I had appropriately psyched myself up for it, and thus the late nights and extra stuff didn't surprise me. I got it all done, too. Then, Sunday came, and I did very little. Monday and Tuesday followed suit, except I did nothing semi-on-purpose. The way I see it, I surrendered to the semester. However, I can't do that until next Wednesday. Back into the paper-writing I go!
This week is remarkably like last week, except I have fewer rehearsals and less mental preparation. It might have broken my spirit to think of two weeks instead of one, but this week is turning into the mantra "It's just one more" much more than the last one did. I'm finally ready to (start and) finish those last two papers. There are also three more performances to go. Everything is neatly halved. This is all I seem to think about.
In my rather desperate bid to avoid everything these past 3 days, I managed to knit a few more rounds of my bag. The cable pattern is very cool. I may continue this as a relaxing activity, but I don't expect a lot of progress in the next seven days.

To sum up: Last week was good, but now I'm tired, stressed, and behind. Wish me luck.

Greeny

Current Mood: annoyed

I actually mean that, so I thought I should get it in today, before stressed!Greeny takes over. (Just so you know, calling someone something-exclamation point-their name denotes a particular aspect or version of that person, so happy!Greeny is basically what I am now, and crazy!- or stressed!Greeny is what I might be soon).

This week went really well, until Thursday, which is when I met with my teacher/adviser about my senior project. Yeah, due to the bad emotional state I was in before break, we never really laid down the guidelines for the paper that's due along with the recitals. 10 pages. Ouch. This is on top of three other papers, two of which are at least 6 pages. (Don't scoff, this is large for me). So, technically, it's doable, if I work hard at it all consistently for the next three to four weeks. I'm torn between: "Yep, I'm gonna bomb.", "Maybe this will work out." and "Pray hard, my friends."

Sometimes, I really hate this senior thing.

Other times, like today, it's not that bad. I wasn't really planning on coming home this weekend, but yesterday night I just couldn't take staying at the apartment any longer (cabin fever, despise it). So I came home, and it was good. Finished the second sock, too.
Today, I went back to my school to hang out with my guy friend, who still doesn't have an appropriate nom-de-plume (or should it be, nom-de-blog?), and it was a lot of fun. We rented a movie (Nick and Nora's Infinite Playlist, I don't recommend it, but it was good for today), and got a pizza (A supreme, of all things. I never thought as a kid I would like supreme pizza, but today I just didn't want much meat.) Then we laughed and groaned at the movie, and talked, and...cuddled? He put his arm around me, sitting on the couch, it felt nice. I showed him the socks, which I am quite proud of, and we walked around campus for an hour, holding hands, talking, and enjoying the day. (Good thing, too, because tomorrow the weather is going to stink.)

Then, after our date (Small digression: I'm having such a hard time adjusting to this new terminology. Outing/hanging out=date, physical contact=cuddling, do I really have to use these terms to be clear about what we're doing?) I hung out with Julie, the wonder roommate, for a while. She likes to clean on Saturdays, and today she also decided to bake brownies. So we had lemonade and brownies, and discussed life and what makes a good friend. I mopped the kitchen and my bathroom afterward, feeling helpful to the cause.

Now, I'm back at home reveling in being myself for the moment, and avoiding reading a certain epic poem that should have been read two weeks ago. However, if that hard and consistent work is to ever get finished, I may as well start it now. (Suddenly I'm questioning the grammar of the sentence above, dang it all.)

Thanks for listening,
Greene

Current Mood: good
Current Location: Home, home on the...city

Long time no talk!
How are you (all) doing?
I'm on vacation with my family in St. Augustine, Florida. It is wonderfully awesome.The whole family has gone on beach vacations before, but this time just seems better. All the kids are old enough (or nearly old enough) to really enjoy this place. Also, we can do the whole independence thing, which in our family is vital to our healthy functioning as people. Friday we explored downtown, and went to Ripley's Believe it or Not! Saturday we went biking on Jekyll Island in Georgia. We get around. Today is a down day. We got some breakfast at the Wildflower Cafe, and then body-boarded the waves (they're quite high), and hung out on the beach. Victoria and Micah (my lovely siblings), took off to go shell shopping and maybe get some ice cream. Me, Mom, and Dad stayed longer.
I'm actually getting some over-the-break reading done for school. Not as much as I need to, but something is better than nothing.
Also, my thumb quit hurting, so I'm knitting again. My first sock is going really well. The pattern is easy to memorize and just pick up and do a row or a half-row during small breaks. I'm about halfway done with it. The striping of the yarn is sorta fascinating.
I'm looking forward to tomorrow, we may be going to Orlando and checking out a theme park.

Later,
Greene

Current Mood: content
Current Location: Hotel in Florida

Though it's also busy, make no mistake. I went to see Les Miserables with my roomie on Saturday. I've apparently stopped caring about deadlines for the English classes I'm in (don't worry, only "read by" deadlines, not papers). The practicing thing is still frustrating me. I have a lesson in an hour and I've fully practiced for it twice. This is worse than last week. I don't know, there's something about this whole "final semester" business that has me blocked from achieving what I want/need to.

I've almost finished some knitted scrubbies with a strange title: Wishy Washy Fishy Tawashi. Tawashi is the Japanese word for scrubbie. According to my roommate, I need to give them mouths before they are truly finished.

And just when I thought that my quilting days were over...my mom finds a completed top in need of quilting. I can't blame her for this, but I was reveling(!) in being done with my quilt.

Yesterday night, I went to an informal gathering of the Ghawazee Mafia. It's a musical group associated with a belly dancing studio. They are in need of a violinist, and I was interested. I don't know if I'll join. After the music portion of the evening, we drummed. I've never done that before, it was rather fun, and I learned quickly.

Okay, maybe my life isn't quite "boring", it's just... overly familiar to me.
Later,
Greeny

Current Mood: anxious

There was some excitement this weekend. If, by excitement, you think non-regular happenings. I actually went home on Friday because orchestra was canceled, and it seemed like a good idea. Julie then came over and we watched Roswell and WALL-E. Kind of ironic, that, we would do the same thing at my house that we would at the apartment. I fell asleep on the couch watching the movie. It was 1am. Waking up with the movie still going but no-one else around was fun.
On Saturday night, I did Dad's accounts and dreaded going to the Dragon's Lair. My band was scheduled to play. But I overcame my dislike of the place and had some fun. It was also our drummer's birthday, so there were mini cupcakes and pizza.
Sunday we tried a different church, I liked it. We thought the service would start at eleven, so we get there in plenty of time to discover that it's actually starting at eleven-thirty. Since we had forty-five minutes, we went to Braums for breakfast. Surprisingly good food. Also, I finished most of Dad's accounts. Yay! There was also band practice, which went way better than our gig, and I got to be in charge of the song order (this made me very happy, I'm a control addict).
Today is just starting, I've tutored my student, and now I'm avoiding practicing. Yep, I need to go now.

This is a shout out to my friend Autumn: Hello! How's your day been?

Greene

Current Mood: amused
Current Location: The Music Building

I watched a movie tonight. Usually, I avoid movies that I know will have emotional climaxes of the serious kind. Today, I was sucked in before I realized, and then I didn't care. It was Good Will Hunting, by the way. It's about a kid from South Boston who's a genius. He grew up in a horrible situation, orphaned early, had abusive foster parents, and at twenty has a rap sheet longer than my arm. He works at MIT as a janitor. One day, he solves a difficult math theorem, or proves it, as they say, and that sets off a whole chain of events. This guy, he's super smart. He doesn't think quite like the rest of humanity. But, he still is human. He shuts people out so they can't abandon him, excepting his three best friends who are his family. Over the course of the movie, he enters therapy, and learns, slowly, to understand that keeping people out is not a good thing. And, that his past is not his fault.

Really, the entire movie, is all about those two things.

I felt great resonance with this character. Mom has always called me a genius. I've always felt that I've been a step behind or beyond or just out of step with the rest of humanity, excepting my closest family. Even then, some periods just weren't fun. I'm in therapy now. I won't bore you with why I started in the first place, but I've been learning extremely similar lessons. I'm fracking afraid of people. I have my reasons, most of them don't stand up to the light, but one is the main reason most people avoid intimacy: rejection. It's a roadblock that I've not felt ready to overcome, yet. As I type this I really want to.

Don't get me wrong, I've made a lot of progress. I can maintain stability in my studies; I have a job now, which used to scare me senseless. I've studied abroad, and looked at grad schools seriously. I think about a lot of things in life differently than I used to because I talked about it with someone.

There is a high turnover rate of the psychologists at TU. They're grad students for the most part, so I've talked with four people over the past three years. If there is one lesson I've learned on my own, it is that change can be positive. My current guy: Jacob, I've only met twice with him. I think he's going to be good for me. I like people who can motivate me (or just give me permission to do what I want to do).

I was going to talk about how this week is going to go well, despite classes being canceled tomorrow, my lack of practicing, and the ice storm. I guess internal revelation trumps triviality. By the way, my younger sister, Victoria, prompted this. She posted on MySpace about her life coming full circle, and how she sees things a bit differently, now. So, thanks, girl.

Greeny

Current Mood: thankful
Current Location: My home away from home
Current Music: 1, 2, 3, 4 by Plain White Tees

I'm baaack.

I love how ominous certain statments are. Onto the news: Chamber group has formed, we are meeting for the first time today. We're a trio, and we're playing Beethoven. (On a related note, I will be having a recital at the end of the semester.) I've started knitting again: a white washcloth for my face, it's so pretty. I've practiced violin somewhat today, a momentous thing in the formation of proper practicing habits.
I may have a new violin student, which will bring my total up to...three! At least I can't negatively impact a large percent of the violin students in town. And I'm officially set to graduate, I've been approved and all that. So, assuming I don't get a D or F in any of my courses, I'm walking in May. All these things make me feel much happier today than I did a week ago.

Today is ridiculously busy, I have maybe five hours "free" out of the entire day. The rest is scheduled tight.

I should go finish practicing, see ya.

Greeny

Current Mood: optimistic
Current Location: Hey, I'm optimistic, that should trump where I am.

This week, as it were, has been busy and stressful. My little list of important tasks has been constantly evolving. I've been to most of my classes twice by now, and I've also been trying to put together a chamber group. This is rather hard to do when you want a pianist, apparently. I'm on my third candidate in as many days.
At least I have two solid possibilities for a cellist, and one solid possibility for a violist. I'm not sure when I'll give up on this, maybe next week. I know that sounds pessimistic, but one has to quit sometime.
As is easy to imagine, not much else is getting done with this much school stuff going on. I'm tired, but I need to read for class tomorrow and practice. So...off I go.

Greeny

Current Mood: calm
Current Location: School

School is now in full swing. I'm sure I will come to regret taking two English classes, seeing that, combined, I have eight papers to write over the semester. At least my classes are on different days this time. Having everything on Mon./Wed./Fri. was rather stressful.

I've been avoiding stuff, lately. Mainly cleaning and arranging for necessary-to-graduate situations. It took me awhile to figure out why exactly I was trying not to be in a chamber group or think about my Senior Project. I fear leaving school. Simple as that. Without the constantly stimulating and progressive environment that is college, I get bored and depressed. Of course, I don't expect my year off to be boring. I'll be taking lessons, teaching violin students, working for an orchestra or two, and maybe taking some business classes at TCC. Also, there is the band to consider; we will be playing gigs, in all likelihood.

Wow, laid out like that, I've got no chance of boredom, I think. I just wish it had as sure an outcome as college does. Though, if you think about it, college is not a sure thing. It is entirely up to a student to do their best to graduate on time, and sometimes it just doesn't work out. Either the student is not up to the constant studying required or stuff is just too hard to pass. I really hope that everything works out properly this semester, I hate do-overs.

Onward! Not much knitting or crocheting happening. I finished the crocheting part of the purse, went out and bought all the necessary finishing stuff, but I think I want to use a machine, not hand sew a lining in. This is the story of my crafting career, plenty of the main craft, and major reluctance to do anything else. I have four projects that just need a little sewing to finish them off. Perhaps I could do that and be triumphant at the end of the semester.

In other news, the quilt has been quilted. I haven't told you all the story of the quilt yet, so I shall: Before I left for college, my great-grandma and I would make quilt blocks together. Our last project before I left was thirty to forty 12-inch-square blocks with fans on them that we salvaged from an old, ruined bedsheet. I, having quite a bit else to think about in college, promptly forgot about them. Then, last Memorial day, we went to visit, and she gave them to me. I am one to leave my own projects unfinished, but not this. So I searched for someone to sew them together. Finally, a lady who was able and willing was located, and I gave them to her, along with some border material. She did so, and recommended another lady who could quilt it (sew the blocks, backing, and some fiber fill in the middle together in a decorative way). That lady said it would take until after the new year, as she was rather busy. I enjoyed my holidays, occasionally sparing a thought for how soon it would be done. The lady called me Monday, and I went and got it. Now, it's not completely finished, as the binding, or edging, has to be sewn on. I'm going back to the lady that sewed the blocks together for that. Overall, I expect this (rather large) quilt to be finished in the next two weeks. Whew! Quite a tale, no? I'd consider this to be my actual Senior Project, except it's not school-related.

I need to go to class now. Until next time,

Greene

Current Mood: satisfied
Current Location: An inpregnable citadel

I'm a senior, in college. Most likely, at the end of this semester I shall graduate, obtaining a degree in Music. This freaks me out just a little. I've been in college for 3 1/2 years, 7 semesters (technically 10). It's surreal. Nothing to be done about it, I guess. Time marches on, they say, but you can't forget that time adds up.
A strange thing I've realized about life is that one never truly knows exactly what they're doing. There are always new and unknown opportunities. I'm slowly coming to terms with this fact. It helps to break it all down into tiny pieces, like a puzzle, or a new piece of music.
In the spirit of the first day of school, I'm back in the apartment (moved back yesterday), and I need to go buy books for my classes. In the ongoing spirit of creating new objects, I've started a purse. It's very soft. We shall not mention certain unfinished items for my brother.
Other than that, my winter vacation was somewhat productive. I managed to reconcile six months of records for my Dad, along with various other projects of small importance. I'm sure that things will get more interesting as the months pass.

Until then,
Greeny

Current Mood: contemplative
Current Location: My home away from home

Really, not one. In any case, life is good. There has been sleeping in accidentally, getting up far too early today on purpose, and lots of little slightly interesting things. I'm having a real problem just finishing Tim's mitts. I have all the materials I need, but no motivation. I have also started a new project. A random washcloth with some very pretty cotton yarn (Lilac...yum). Having finally gotten bored enough (or that's my excuse, anyway), I (re-)started the never-ending task of entering my Dad's financial stuff. It is good to be useful.
Do you like tuna? I do, a lot. I wanted some yesterday, but all we had was a can of salmon. Never having had canned salmon before, I wasn't sure what to expect, but it tastes quite a lot like tuna. There was also quite a bit more of it than the little tins of tuna contain.

Ahh, the rambling continues...later.

Greeny

Current Mood: lethargic

...do as others do. I kind of feel like I'm hiding at home, but there's not anywhere else to be at the moment.

It's been rather boring here. I've settled into a comfortable pattern of get up, make food, read/knit/reconcile accounts/watch TV until it's late, and then go to bed. By making food, I mean actually cooking. In the past three days I've made two omelets, a steak, chicken and dressing, chicken noodle soup, sausage and cheese balls, and cookies (pre-made, I just baked 'em). The joy of cooking for six people is that they eat it all up.

I also finished Tim's mitts, knitting-wise. I still have to embroider the little Naruto sigils on them. But hey! Finished objects mean I get to start another project. I'm kind of stuck on it, honestly. I would love to knit a small but very pretty Christmas ornament, despite the fact that holidays have passed and we took down the tree today. However, I don't have the right size needles. I could do a belt, but I need more colors of yarn from my apartment (I'm going there tomorrow). Alternatively, I could just find a pattern that works with what I have with me, but then I'll be stuck with it until it's done, and wish I was doing what I originally intended. So...tomorrow things will get sorted.

P.S. I realized I never followed up on the finals business. To my shock, I got A's across the board. I now have a real shot at being a cum laude graduate.

See ya,
Greene

Current Mood: weird

Yesterday I went and recorded four songs for the band's demo CD. The process was long, and required a lot of picky attention to detail (I was great at it). Tiring, but ulitmately satisfying, I had the very strange experience of hearing myself play in stereo. You see, I recorded two of the songs twice. Once as I normally play it, with some reverb, and again plain, so that Scott (our drummer and dude in charge of recording stuff) can apply his own effects. These songs were mostly ones I've played since I started with the band, so one would assume I know them well. Not only that, I seem to play them the same every time. It freaked me out how consistent I was when two different versions recorded at least thirty minutes apart were when played together. I play like myself, apparently, how unusual is that?

After that, I had a good dinner, read a book in six hours, and went to bed. The mitts are still a work in progress, I seem stalled, but I am gaining ground slowly. Life here is a bit boring, no classes to get me out and about. I'm going to go work on Dad's accounts, now.

Bye,
Greeny

Current Mood: accomplished
Current Location: Somewhere...eating an apple

I finally got enough sleep. This seems to be a never-ending battle with the forces of "Let's go do stuff!" Anyway, today has been very low key. I knit more on Timothy's mitts (started 'em yesterday morning, I had a car ride to fill). The first one is now six or seven inches long. This time I have more than enough yarn to finish both at pattern length, but I'm shortening them because I think they're too long. I've never worked with black wool before. A very interesting experience. One needs good light. I also have to do it in short bursts because it's kinda scratchy, especially against the finger that is continually in contact with. I was rather proud of myself, last night, for being able to cable and not having made any mistakes. Then, of course, I made one: a dropped stitch, right under the cable. However, the repair skills I learnt during Victoria's top came to the rescue, and I was able to fix it without ripping out whole rows. I am continually amazed at how pretty knitting is. It's even, stitch after stitch, and it has more possibilities than I can think of or do right now. Presently, I'm fixated on doing cables. Once I get that out of my system I'm trying some color work. I've never done more than switch colors, but I could create pictures with two or more colors!
Erm, sorry, I get excited at the creative possibility.
There is more going on here than knitting, of course. My older sister and her fiance are still here, and today they made sushi fixings. Sticky rice, avocado, cream cheese, crab, chicken, cucumber, ginger, wasabi sauce, and mayonaise. I re-learned how to make it, and the rolls are quite good (best I've had, in fact). I also helped Mom grade papers, which is good, because she is very behind. Other than that, not much going on. I am slowly converting over to books on tape so I can knit and 'read' at the same time.

I'm hungry, gotta go.

Greeny

Current Mood: good
Current Location: A secret location in the city.
Current Music: Tim's video game sounds

I was made for this role. I have always wanted to be the responsible one who gets to decide everything. Not all the time, but occasionally. We went out, found the bar, had a lot of fun, actually. There was drinking, giggling, dancing, hitting-upon, and drunk math (I'm kidding about the last one, I calculated the tip). Then we went to get ice cream. I had a banana split. It was quite yummy. We only stayed out 'til 11:30pm, and that was very fine by me. I'm not a late night partier. I believe one should start around seven and end around eleven. Sleep is good.

Things I have learned about slightly (and not-so-slightly) drunk people: Their tongues are loosened, if you want to know something they wouldn't normally tell you, get them a drink or three. It doesn't take much to get them laughing (figured that one out already). Balance, after a while, is a problem. Drunk people are easily diverted, bring up a new subject, and they basically forget the past. Also, they are basically children, treating them as such is possibly a good idea. (Example: Don't let them wander, or drive). I must say, I get this whole designated driver thing a lot better, now. It's cool.

I should go finish things.
See ya.
Greenly

Current Mood: amused
Current Location: Apartment, the 100,382nd.

Hey everyone, (I will always assume that more than one person reads this, that's my Mother's overly positive influence working) I posted twice today. I don't think you can see it (it's in private mode), but this is an edited version of what I wrote in the other post. Despite my natural inclinations to pure bluntness, many years of my Mother's thoughtful and rather forceful influence have helped me realize when something is too much information. Sorry if I'm making you frustrated. I personally hate not getting all the possible information.

I've been told many things about myself. That I'm pretty today, or fat, or sharp-eared (good at hearing stuff), blunt, entertaining, memorable, unique, articulate. You know what? I don't care what you say. It may hurt or feel good temporarily, but in the end I decide how to feel about myself. I decide what adjectives to use when I introduce myself. I may forget that some days, but it's true.

So that is how I feel. Strangely I feel I must make some declaration of intent to remember this every day, but I try to be a realist (not a catastrophist, contortionist, or procrastinator), and I know with my little voice of truth inside that I will forget some days. It's called being human.

My night was pretty darn good. My day was pretty fine, as well. I tutored, turned in the infamous paper, bought milk, talked to my lady (last time with her, sadly), made biscuits, watched my other student play in a recital, and watched a movie and Roswell. Yeah, my life is very good. I have my health, sanity (so I believe, which makes it suspect, weirdly), self-respect, skill in music, free time, and family and friends.

I saw the full moon tonight. I was driving down the road and...boom! I was right in front of me. God's gift of light artistically accented by this lazy, flat 'x' of contrails. Man can't improve on perfection, but maybe an imperfection here and there is also workable. It makes things approachable, more beautiful, somehow. What is an android to a beautiful lady?

I'm done, not with life or my relationships. Just this post.

See ya,
Greeny

Current Mood: thoughtful
Current Location: My little corner of paradise
Current Music: The rather drunken murmurs of the people outside

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deepgreen18

November 2012

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Entries tagged with life

I am Confused, Jubilant, and Tired

I am Twenty-one, going on Twenty...

Wednesday update

Two More Things...

Keeping Promises

Happy April, Everyone!

Vacation!

My Life is Boring...

Bits and Pieces

Trumping Triviality

Hello Again!

The Happening

Passive Avoidance, and Tales of Crafts

The Beginning

I Haven't a Clue

While in Hiding...

Remarkably Consistent

Sushi, and yarn

My Life as a Designated Driver

The Moon was Beautiful Tonight