deepgreen18: (music)
I had a concert last night. My school orchestra (we call it the Philharmonia) performed excerpts from Porgy and Bess. I've been enjoying playing the pieces, as they are quite different from the usual Classical fare, and extremely well suited to the story they portray. George Gershwin knew what he was doing when he wrote this, and did it well with this opera.

Performing this piece reminded me of why I enjoy playing with a large group so much. As we went through the beginning of the first act, there is a classic buildup in volume and speed. One of the themes of the opera is the music imitating a train, which is a lot of fun. So here we are, piano leading to choir giving way to brass and finally joining in with strings. The moments of that were almost perfect in their synchronicity. Everyone was playing the same music, listening to each other, and watching our conductor for the beat. The feeling of collective gathering was palpable to me, and the music was so clear. The first time that ever happened to me I got chills, a large emotional reaction, and was rather scared of it, actually. It took me several years to understand that these rare moments of clarity in music are something for which to strive.

It is a shame we cannot do that more often, but it is a college orchestra that tends to disappoint those with high expectations more often than not. Still, though, we had it that time, and that will encourage me until I feel it again.

Greeny
deepgreen18: (clefs)

Well! After all that hard work getting into grad school. Perhaps I should say stressful work - because I didn't really work hard, you know? I actually slacked off a little on the practicing (which makes it that much more amazing that I got in) and did my utmost to avoid anything that might actually get the results I wanted. It was quite the revelation when it all got done. I was so much less stressed, wrung out, and unhappy. Lately, I've been observing a bed time. It's lovely to get enough (or nearly enough) sleep. Another revelation, I suppose. -  I'm doing something new: doing stuff related to grad school without procrastinating...much. Moving to Ohio, I realized, is kind of a big deal. If I don't stay on top of it, it will turn into a huge, stressful, unhappy ordeal just like applying for grad school was.

Yesterday I made my first steps towards finding an apartment by looking at the housing options at the school. Today I sent out an e-mail to a grad student who goes there for some advice on outside apartments. Tomorrow will find me doing something else. I'm (finally) doing something proactive, and it's a relief, honestly.

The funniest thing about this is that I got myself going, once again, with help from my psychology class. Maybe I should take one every couple of years, just to refresh on how stubborn and dumb people can be, and how to not be that way. Simply learning about stress, and what kind of situations cause it, helped me keep this situation from going toxic. This makes me happy.

Before I got started on the "doing something" phase, tax season came. This is my first year to do them. I started them April 14th, and then my dad helped me file for an extension. They much closer to completion now. Here are a few things I've learned from the experience: People hate the IRS for a reason, parents encourage you to keep records on the computer for very good reasons, I will be using a computer program from now on, and it's really interesting to find out how much money you make.

On a side note, I recently got my violin appraised, and most acoustic instruments appreciate with time. It is near and dear to my heart, my violin. Soon, I'll be getting a bow worthy of it. I may also be buying a blue electric violin (Pops concert last weekend with a jazz fiddler who had one inspired me in many ways [see below]. His violin, though, be still my heart).

In other news, I've officially started my cardigan. The ladies at Loops (a local yarn store, or LYS) downtown were very nice and assisted me in picking a pattern after I got stuck. I had no idea that one could search a yarn on Ravelry for patterns made with it. The pattern is to be Short 'n Sweet from The Happy Hooker crochet book. Here's a link to someone else's version. Mine will be beige, or off-white, pearl, vanilla, whatever you wish to call it, down to my waist (I am determined to have a cardigan, not a bolero) and will probably have buttons, you never know.

Finally, Mother and I began working out a few weeks back. She mentioned the blog today and asked if I had mentioned our outings. I had no idea that a mention on the blog was important, but here it is, Mom! We've been biking or walking about two times a week. My bum really doesn't like biking for too long, but it is good exercise. You know, I don't think I've ever described my mother here. In three words, my mom is: buff, boxer, chick. She used to be a: religious, asthmatic, housewife (with five kids). Then she went back to school, got her degree in Health and Human Performance, and discovered working out. She's quite the inspiration, if you are the type to look up to people and feel inspired, rather than jealous and insecure (guess which way I swing). 

Gotta go read my psych book,

Greeny
 

deepgreen18: (Default)
The socks are done. I'm going to Ohio in August. I finished a bathmat.

The socks are rather big one me (but I love them), and used up all of a skein plus a little more (boo!). Now I have extra sock yarn I won't want to use for at least another month. I had a smallish case of startitis after I finished the socks. I tried to start a cardigan (I'm still trying, actually), and then moved on to the bathmat. It is called Absorba, The Great Bathmat. I love it for many reasons: It is made from three strands of cotton, more than I've ever tried before; It is made from three/four colors: peach, yellow, and blue/white, and I got to play with all of the combinations possible from the three; it's cushy and soft, and dense, and just wonderful! 

Ohio. I'm going to live there in the fall. This doesn't scare me nearly as much as I think it should. I will be living the farthest away from my family I ever have, going to graduate school, doing more-or-less adult things. Honestly? I'm rather excited. Lots of stuff to think about. Where am I going to live? Do I need new doctors? Where will I get car insurance? Details of living. I don't know the answers to the questions...yet. I'm working on it. Sometimes, I'm absolutely amazed I made it this far. I've said before that getting through applications and auditions was torturous, and I still think so. Maybe it will be better when I go for my doctorate.

Gotta go,
Greeny
deepgreen18: (Default)
I really don't like where I'm living now. I'm getting ready to leave and - Wow, we interrupt this regularly scheduled rant to bring you breaking news: I'm in a bad mood. The bad mood affects how I see life. I enjoy where I live right now pretty well, actually. Where I used to live, on the other hand, I hated with a spectacular passion that I had to suppress until I moved or I would have been very depressed. My city is a good one. Not too large, not so small that I can get across it in thirty minutes. Something new can be found every day. I'm also so tired I mis-spelled at least ten of the last twenty words.

The reason I'm in a bad mood, you ask? I've been sick since Monday. Steadily improving, I think, but my energy is low and my voice is a third or so lower. Also, my older sister and her fiance are in town. Family. Gotta love it. There's been a lot of ups and downs. I'm so tired that I want to stay in, but I feel guilty that I'm not spending time with family. Then again, they surprised us with the timing of the visit (nine days before Christmas), and the scarf had to be speed-knit. (It's done! By the way, and absolutely gorgeous.) Perhaps the resentment can cancel out the guilt. I really want to see her face when she opens it, though. That may make up for a lot. Uh-oh, I sense high expectations. Large chance of disappointment, abort, abort!

I've practiced violin very consistently over the past four to seven days. I haven't been counting so much as thinking that I should practice every day. Empowerment from working out with Mom? I have time, I might as well. Also, I don't have time, graduate school deadlines loom.

I hate the looming, I really do. It scares me and makes me want to run for cover instead of getting my ducks into line. I just want it to be finished already. Circle of procrastination alert. I wait, which makes me nervous, which makes me wait more, which makes me panic, which either makes me wait until next year, or (I think) try to get everything in and do a bad job of it, so I wait.  It's a bad cycle. I have to see things as nonthreatening in order to start, but urgent enough to actually get it done. Getting applications in just isn't that way. It's threatening. You are opening yourself to criticism and rejection by sending it. You are trying to change your life by doing it. It's significant. I can't see it any other way. The solution, I suppose, is to gird oneself for the inevitable. Be fearless. What could happen? It's paper. If they say yes, you can always say no. But you really want them to say yes. !%$#. However, acting confident, ever if you aren't, usually leads to good things. I learned that from my violin teacher. Play loud and fast, and sometimes (usually after lots of practice) everything just gets better.

I want to thank the English language and the written expression of it for allowing this rant to happen. Until next time, kiddies.

Greeny
deepgreen18: (Default)
I am finding it interesting that life now has events I wish to blog about. Perhaps it is me, rather than the events, that has changed.

The Sunday gig was a mess, a challenge, and a victory. It certainly wasn't easy. We were dealing with a new PA system and didn't have all the correct parts at first (thank goodness for eager-to-please boyfriends/roadies). I went slightly amnesiatic and forgot to bring an amp...or extra strings. Turns out I needed both. Well, the amp was superceded by me plugging directly into the PA, and Micah saved the day by fitting me with a guitar string. I'm not sure whether this is a first in all of history, but it felt like one. All I know is that a 26 gauge guitar string is fairly close in size to a violin G string. Who knew? The whole band went to a local grill afterwards and had some pretty darn good burgers.

The afghan is 2 hours of work away from the finish line. I've done the first row of the border. It's about 620 stitches around. I believe that is the longest row I've ever done. I'm currently doing my crocheting at my violin teacher's house. I'm house-sitting, another first for me. Her cats are really fun to play with. They have very distinctive personalities, but share a lot of traits, as well. Cat nature is very strong.

I've signed up for the GRE. It is two weeks from now. In preperation, I will be going through a test prep book on the math part. The practice test I took last year gave me high marks on verbal, but I was rather bad at the math. I'm surprising myself by sticking to this college search thing; last time I was very lackadaisical.

Finally, I have a new interest to report. I've always considered myself an eclectic book reader. However, my actual mode of operation is that I'll try anything once, but I usually stick with sci-fi/fantasy, dabbling occasionally in romance, westerns, mysteries, etc. There's a new genre to add to my list: non-fiction art mysteries. I think I just like knowing that it's real (can't get unrealistic when it's historical fact) and that the mystery has been solved already, so I won't be left in suspense. Also, most writers of this genre work hard to make it comprehensible and interesting. If nothing else, I like good writing. I'm currently reading The Man Who Loved Books Too Much by Allison Hoover Bartlett. Book thieves, unofficial detectives, and oodles of book references! I'm so there.

Well, I must be off. Lunch awaits. In case I don't post again soon: Happy Thanksgiving.

Greeny

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November 2012

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